When you’re about to hit “enter” on a post that pointedly critiques another human being who is highly likely to see it and read those comments and also highly likely to feel, at best, a hint of pain…don’t you think twice about it? And if so, why do you then go through with publishing the post? This is an open question.

There’s a huge difference between writing “Lindsey Lohan is such a slag” and “BloggerXYZ is such a slag, and a bad writer at that” because BloggerXYZ has closely-monitored google alerts and free time and probably already reads you. Not to say that celebrities don’t have feelings or anything—but at least they profit from the publicity, even if it’s negative attacks.

Even though we all mock/badmouth people when they’re not around, that distance protects them from hearing the scrutiny and it doesn’t directly hurt them. But online, there’s not only no distance, but there’s permanence and everyone who wants to can overhear. Most bloggers know what it feels like to be discussed by someone else on a public forum, so why don’t have the caution to not do it to others? I’m not talking about Gawker here—they actually get to monetize their gossip, so I understand why they do it. I’m trying to understand why the Gawker-esque style can, and does, extend to a place like Tumblr where all anyone gets out of a badmouth-y piece is, maybe, a few “likes.”

Doesn’t it take a special level of de-humanization to put stuff out there *knowing* that the person you’re referring to, but not addressing, is bound to have a personal interaction with your post? I’m not saying that I’ve never said mean things about people—actually, lately, it’s been a party trick of mine and it worries me and maybe that’s why I’m thinking about this now—but instead I want to see whether people have any opinions about (or objections to) the fact that there’s a constant opportunity to not post personal attacks about those in the same [chat] room and that deciding to do it anyway kind of sucks. Feel free to share!

I guess what I’m trying to understand is exactly what it FEELS like to know that posted personal attacks are likely to be seen by the recipient and why, if one is not making money or even really getting that much attention, one does it *in public* anyway? I mean it when i say this is an open question and something I’ve been wondering for a while and not just meant for three people involved in a tumbldebate right now.